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SOMEONE TO LOVE

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What if the world stops spinning for one entire second? What if the earth blows up into millions of fragments, which travel around the universe? What if the simple term, existence, disappears? What if I stop existing?

The last question has been circling my head for a long period of time and still now after invariably measuring the pros and cons of my existence, I hark back to square one. My eyes wander off to the farthest corner whirling to make sense of the inexorably moving objects, my hands are waving the air, scratching its intangible surface to envisage my worthless journey of life. I get on my feet, still wobbly from my sudden peril into a world of fantasy.

What I don’t understand is how? A few months back, everyone worshipped me, they had pledged to serve by my side forever, everyone used to herald my arrival, they canonized me and stood by my side. King Liam! King Liam! They would holler around the corridors of the classroom. But then suddenly they began to disdain me. And as if I never existed, they ceased noticing me. Ever since that one heinous day, my life has turned into turmoil. I am unraveling, shredding into tiny hopeless strands of my soul and yet no one has conversed with me.

All I want is to be noticed once again and to regain my authority.

 

After a while of despondent pondering, my mind cruises in the sea of dubious thoughts, my hand axiomatically lifts the remote and switches on the tv. In front of my eyes, the gleaming screen and the insolent pictures are shown. A school shooting had recently taken place and when the suspect was interrogated, he said, “I wanted them to notice me. And they did!” He smiles as parents of the students affected, growl at the news reporters for making disarray. Empty hands are shoved against that child’s ghastly actions, his fallacious acts wake something inside of me. The raging monster inside of the impenetrable cage of my soul, evades the protection. I leave my room with the intent of buying a gun. My parents, who were devoted to me, don’t turn their heads as I enter the drawing room. After my great fall, they have gone out of their ways to be oblivious to me. And I ideate if they will engross in my life and my maladies then.

I shut the door behind me sternly and approach my bike, I set my reasons and aims straight and set out on a venture to buy myself respect and authority.

 

The air dawdles around me, sweeping inside me and entangling morsel of me, my eyes ferret out the scales of my school, circulating the imperative game plan to my head. The ground ,below me, agitates as I take a step into the gate. I hold on to my bag, pressing closely the gun against my thigh, securing my bag I go about the corridor as usual. And conventionally no one pays heed to me until now.

 

I swing the gun out of my backpack and shove in front of them, all of them freeze and settle into a submissive position. Authority!

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